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Man, crying not a sign of weakness
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March 11, 2009
By Charlotte Fairfax
It seems corny, but I am dying to ask author Siphiwo Mahala as soon as we start the interview: "So … do you cry?" But I hold back.
We chat instead about the issue of moral degeneration, a topical theme in South Africa, and the anthem of the book. Was it the current situation in the country that inspired the story?
"Not really," says Mahala. "I just wanted to write the story, and not one that I was necessarily in. But one way or another the story you write reflects the environment you inhabit."
When a Man Cries is described as "an uncompromising and engrossing novel about the challenges of manhood in contemporary South African society… (interrogating) the dynamics of township life and the human and socio-economic realities of the most impoverished communities in post-apartheid South Africa" .
Themba Limba, the protagonist, is a family man - a teacher, a pillar of morality.
But through a series of Greek-like tragedies, and mostly sexually motivated decisions, he loses everything he holds dear.
"Themba brings about his own downfall," explains Mahala.
"Things happen in life, and we all have to make decisions.
From the beginning, Themba is enjoying himself. His notion of strength is based on his sexual conquests. But he makes some decisions which eventually lead to his downfall, and to the realisation of where true strength lies."
But it is not all doom and gloom: "He gets into it because of his ego, but eventually he sheds tears - something he has resisted doing. In that moment he finds his true strength.
"When he does eventually cry he realises his tears are 'the expression of the infinite longing for complete humanness'."
So why a book on manhood? What was the catalyst?
"Over the years I have written short stories around the theme of defining modern manhood.
"But I remember watching Bishop Desmond Tutu crying during the televised Truth and Reconciliation Commission. It was a shock for me. I had never seen my father cry, and so seeing this man of strength cry on national television made an impact.
"I had to question the notion - does crying make you any less of a man? Then there is Keaorapetse Kgositsile's famous line, 'Only the pillow knows the tears of a man'. I have just tried to elaborate on this theme.
"Another reason is that I am the only son after three girls, I have always been aware of what makes me different to them. One is socialised as a boy to believe you are stronger and that you cannot cry as it would denigrate your gender.
"So in some way the violence we experience in our society is a result of men needing to prove themselves and their strength."
So I have to ask him now, "do you cry?"
Mahala shifts, looks straight at me and confidently says: "I do cry. I am, after all, a human being. Crying is an emotion and one has to express these emotions. Those who don't cry might prove their strength in devastating ways."
Mahala was born in Grahamstown, and completed a BA honours degree at Fort Hare University, and a Master of Arts degree in African Literature at Wits University.
His love for books was fuelled by his father who, Mahala says, was a wonderful storyteller.
"My father worked at Diocesan School for Girls in Grahamstown and would regularly bring home books for me to read. But I have always been attracted to stories and visual imagery.
"In Standard 4 I was drawing picture-stories way before I got into serious literature. Then I started to write short stories in Xhosa, inspired by Peter Mtuze."
Mahala's face lights up: "At university I really began to read Njabulo Ndebele's works. His Fools and Other Stories, mostly about boyhood, drew me in. I could see myself there.
"His style invited me in to read. But there were other great African writers like Chinua Achebe, Can Themba and Nadine Gordimer whose writing truly inspired me."
Mahala's short stories have appeared in several anthologies, including the Southern African Short Story Review (2002), "A" is For Ancestors (2004) and Words Gone Two Soon (Skotaville; 2005).
He is the recipient of the 2006 Ernst van Heerden Creative Writing Award for When a Man Cries (UKZN; 2007).
Mahala joined the national Department of Arts and Culture in 2004 as the deputy director of books and publishing.
He has just finished translating his novel, When a Man Cries, into Xhosa.
Mahala will participate in a number of workshops during the festival, including Writing in Our Tongues, at the Bat Centre at 10am on Saturday.
At 7.30pm that day, at the Elizabeth Sneddon Theatre, he will feature with Futhi Ntshingila in a session titled Mzansi Rising. The programme that evening also includes Max du Preez and cartoonist Zapiro. Info: www.cca.ukzn.ac.za
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