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You ruined my night, SABC!
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September 4, 2009
By Zane Henry
My editor tried to hold me back, my mother warned me against it, my wife told me to get a life. Nay! I will speak out! On behalf of the voiceless, the reticent, the millions who can't get through to the SABC complaints department!
%@#$ you SABC3! %@#$ you!
You ruined that most hallowed of TV nights, Survivor Finale Night. Now, I'm tolerably educated. I know that TV is a crock. And I know that reality TV is the crockiest of the crock. But, dammit, Survivor is a thoroughly entertaining crock. And Survivor China was the first season I'd followed in ages.
For months I followed the misadventures of the gormless Americans in China. I championed Todd's scheming. I laughed at Jean-Robert's idiocy. I hated Peih-Gee for being so frikken' annoying. I fell in love with the emaciated, acerbic Courtney. I wanted to stroke James's beautiful bald head.
So come the finale, I cancelled tickets to the opera, gave up on making the next day's deadlines, ordered some pizza, took the phone off the hook and settled in. And for what? For what?!?! An epic fail by SABC3.
We were taken straight from the final three's preparation for the jury's inquisition to Todd's gleeful, victorious munchkin-face.
The crucial link between the finale's segments was missing. I threw my pizza at the TV and watched the reunion show with bile rumbling in my belly.
Afterwards, the channel switched to the news with no apology. Apparently, the missing segment was aired after the news but by then it was too late. I'd turned the TV off and was scrubbing mozzarella from that gap between the volume control and power button.
Since Monday, SABC3 has been running apologies and says it will run the rectified version on Sunday at 2pm.
In a press release, SABC3 general manager Mathe Mosito-Okaba apologises for and explains the screw-up as follows: "The Survivor China episodes have always been scheduled as seven segments and because last night's episode (because it was a special broadcast) came in as eight segments, the individual who scheduled this unintentionally omitted the last segment. Internal procedures are being followed in addressing this matter."
Too little too late, Mr General Manager. Now, I know the SABC has been shaky for a while but I haven't taken any of their shortcomings personally until now. Isn't anything sacred up at Auckland Park anymore?
A crumbling corporation is no excuse for messing up Survivor night.
By the way, Mr General Manager, I have sent an invoice to your office from my local TV repairman. It turns out that you can't get mozzarella out of that gap between the volume control and the power button.
zane.henry@inl.co.za
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