Joost van der Westhuizen claims it was cowardice that made him deny he was the drug-taking man who indulged in an intimate act with a scantily clad woman in a now infamous video.
Not only has he admitted it, but he has also written about it in his tell-all book Man In The Mirror, which hit bookstores on Monday. Van der Westhuizen's shock revelation to the biographer, David Gemmell, came out of the blue. It was not until the final chapter that the truth, that he was the man in the video, was revealed.
Joost and Amor - before the confession
"Just over three years ago I made the biggest mistake of my life. I did something I will probably regret for the rest of my life. Against all my principles, I had a sexual liaison - we never had intercourse - with a woman who was not my wife. And we took drugs.
"As fate would have it, and unbeknown to me, the girl I was with filmed the incident.
"I am embarrassed by some of the things I said at the time. My reaction, to deny, was totally wrong," he said.
"I should have immediately acknowledged that it was me. It could have made it better because denying made the press go after me. I was wrong."
Van der Westhuizen said his wife, Amor Vittone, had been humiliated when he admitted his betrayal after months of denials that the man in the video was him.
At the time the news broke, Amor stuck by her husband and gave interviews where she said the man in the video was not Van der Westhuizen.
"She was horrified and humiliated about everything I did. I asked for forgiveness from her but how can I ask her to forgive if I cannot forgive myself? Amor has to work through her pain and decide whether she will forgive me. I could lose my family and do not know what the future holds," Van der Westhuizen said.
Van der Westhuizen paid R80 000 to lawyers to deal with the matter when news of the video broke and has also been fired from his SuperSport commentary job.
The channel's spokesperson, Clinton van den Berg, said on Sunday the two parties had mutually agreed to terminate his contracts in light of the revelations.
"The decision was also about the betrayal of trust and the admission of drug-taking. When the news broke, we met and asked him about it, and he denied that he was on the video. And now with his admission, that comes to the betrayal of trust.
"It is also not in SuperSport's interests to have someone on air who has admitted to being a drug user," Van den Berg said.
Van der Westhuizen said he understood that the channel had to protect it's brand. "That is the price I will have to pay for my mistakes," he said.
He said he had decided to write the book because he was tired of lying. "I am very disappointed in myself. I have written this book because it's a life lesson. I hope I can help someone else not to make the same mistakes," he said.
This article was originally published on page 3 of The Star on November 02, 2009
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